Reality Check.

This week and the previous one are often called "Hell Week"and "Death Week" on college campuses all over america. A term that is used to describe the time when lists are made,  composed of  overwhelming projects, book reports, exams and so on that are worth the majority of your grade in the class that semester. Timelines and news feeds are filled with complaints about how a particular assignment will be the "death of me"or brings them to a point in which they post "Kill me now". On occasion you might pass by a conversation that sounds like this, BOB1: "what does this week look like for you?" BOB2 :"Like death". . .

That was my reality. my attitude. I jokingly have made some of those comments in the last week (when you are up till 4:30AM several nights in a row working on a particular subject. . . your attitude isn't always the best.) but I WAS WRONG. 

*Disclaimer: I am simply pondering. processing. reflecting. and trying to learn, while celebrating the life of a brother.

On 1:30 Saturday night I was given a reality check - a horrid,  and awful reality check that left pain and chaos in its wake.

Death became a reality this weekend. 

I didn't know Daniel very well, but he made GREAT stir fry, and always had a smile!

. . .This week has left me with a broken heart and a burden that I carry for those that I love, my brothers and sisters in Christ, who LOVED Daniel well (those that still do).

The sounds of shocked and broken sobs from my friends echoing in that auditorium are seared into my memory and not easily forgotten.
I don't have answers I can offer, Words are inadequate, and I cannot begin to have an idea of the grief that they are enduring. IT SUCKS. I don't like seeing some of my favorite people hit rock bottom and being unable to help them.

The reality check that we as people are not immune to death and loss is good. Even though the death and loss itself is HORRID, a nightmare. I do not believe we were made to handle such tragedy, we are incapable. We were made to know goodness and Love, companionship and creativity, but Asa BUT, There is a solution that satisfies the need that our distorted nature creates. Christ. I think that there is a odd beauty in being awakened to that need, because it is only when we are truly needy to we crave and desire the solution.

Maybe that is where joy comes into play. I believe that is possible to have joy when you are sorrowful, because joy - deep and abiding is not happiness. Joy is more.

MAYBE JOY IS THE MINDSET THAT DESPITE THE DARKNESS (EVIL) OF THIS WORLD THERE IS STILL LIGHT (GOODNESS). 

In studying for one of my classes I was reminded that God is righteous! Meaning that He fulfills every relationship perfectly.
That includes his relationship with darkness. That means He knows the correct PLACE of darkness and also what is IN the darkness.
He is in control. He is sovereign. Despite what has taken place.
AND. . .

In him there is new beginnings and New hope that we can cling to. 

It doesn't mean we are going to have answers we want, but thats when we MUST trust. Trust in someone who is constant and unchanging. Someone outside of time, in whom is the source of life.
I am thankful that Daniel knew life, that he knew the source of all life, and that he knew his identity was in Christ. I am thankful that He LOVED the Lord with his whole heart and I am jealous of him. Because he is face to face with The King of Glory! - which is way better than winning the lottery!
He is in paradise! A paradise that Paul writes about in 2 Corinthians 12:1-4. A Paradise that makes men want to boast! A paradise that those who believe in the name of Jesus Christ get to enter into because of His victory over death on the cross, and their restored relationship with God!

Life here on earth is simply a gift from God, it's is always a gift - a gift that I am guilty of forgetting, one that I am not entitled to by right; but one that I have. One that we are all given - even during finals week, even during the midst of tragedy. 

Maybe I can't offer answers to tragedy or the horrid things in life, and maybe I can't make that hollow ache - that gapping hole that comes from senseless tragedy go away. But I can pray, and love, and I can share moments of laughter, with my friends, with those hurting and remind them of the other reality. The reality of life. 

Things to Ponder

* PAUSE THE STUDYING* 

     Whether you are a college student, an adult, a parent or high schooler who is surfing the web I hope you continue reading especially if you like food for thought. I think one of the biggest mistakes believers make is being uneducated (notice is didn't say believe) in the world of modern literature and philosophy. I am not above this, and I admit to living under a rock for a long time, but I'm catching up.
     This semester I had psychology so naturally I learned about all the "greats". . . Freud, Adler, Jung, Skinner and more, but as I am studying for my LAST FINAL EXAM ** INSERT fist pump here**  I am reading up on Frankl, who by far is my favorite. Partly because he is a believer and partly because so far he is the most interesting. Anyway, at the moment I figured a little study break and plus  I just wanted to share with you some of his wise words:

"To those who say they will not believe in God because they cannot verify His existence empirically through normal scientific means, Frankl responds by saying that they should get over their immature epistemology. Many realities exist that we cannot examine in a direct, sensory way. No one can directly see, physically handle, or directly measure sorrow, loneliness, hope, faith, love, peace, joy, or meaning – the most basic and most important of human realities."

"Man loses respect for himself and others when he loses his contact with his Creator." 

"Stripped of their belief in God, men quickly fall into a close-ended, close-minded, “philosophical” Naturalism."

"He (referring to Frankl)  finally asked himself what kind of meaning could entirely depend on having a child, or publishing a manuscript. In that moment, he saw that if there ever is to be a true meaning to a man’s life, it must be a meaning from beyond himself and his surroundings, an unconditional one, a meaning that cannot be destroyed by suffering or death." 

All of these come from a book I have to finish reading called "From Sigmund Freud to Viktor Frankl:  How Psychiatry Became Human" written by Stephen H. Farrah. (who just so happens to be my prof) and I am really loving it. 
     To elaborate a bit on what I said earlier - it is important to know what is going on in the mind of the world around you - TO BE AWARE - since we are called to be IN, but NOT OF. (Think of it like this, a foreigner goes  to a country but refuses to know any of the traditions or ways of the people yet wants to connect and build relationships. . .Its pretty impossible) So, next time you want something challenging to read or think about pick op a philosophy/psych/or famous novel BUT just remember to compare it to The TRUTH God has given us.  It is good to think (spiritual exercise to strengthen your spiritual belief), to be aware of what false truth is out there and be reminded how much better Gods Truth is in comparison to mans understanding of life. Food For thought . . .
Anyway, I better get back to my book 6:30 is getting closer by the minute.
Have a great night!
- Jac

A New Tradition.

Ladies and Gentlemen - If you are reading this...
Welp, It is Friday and there is much going on in this life I live. Exams, projects, beach trips, growth, and then there is me and Hannah's friendship. In other words Starting a week ago... or two week will be posting a video blog known as "The Hannah and Jacqueline show... (with some fancy title inserted here! )"
So whether you are young or old, guy or girl, little or big.... Here is something to make you laugh! ***

ENJOY! and... thanks for watching! You guys are the best!


P.S: Next time we will make it shorter.. but it is worth watching... Really. It is a good end to a busy week.

GENIUS.

   Tonight I took my first PSYcHoLoGy EXAM; and if you know anything about that topic you'll know there is a TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON of information. Some I deem useless but that is why I am NOT a psych major and not a scientist... ask the my friends.. me as a scientist... that is a scary thought.

   I was up to my elbows in words I could NOT pronounce and not particularly thrilled about spending quality time with my textbook, Freud (that man had some questionable qualities), Adler or the lobes of the brain for that matter. But I did; and whatdaya know I learned something. 

GOD IS A FREAKING GENIUS.  

   There was a TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON of information we covered in these first couple classes and that I had to memorize and review tonight, and there is going to be more in the classes to come. Not to mention this is just GENERAL PSYCH! There is more information out there than a human could ever retain. 

God knows every answer to ever question people could and have ever asked on top of ALL the information that scientists and psychologists have yet to discover. 

WoW. 

   Yeah. Thats what I thought in the middle of my complaining about the 6+ hours I'd put in to studying for this test...... then I took a moment and looked at my paper. Looked at all the details that I had to memorize describing the composition and specific duties of these microscopic cells and then it hit me.

NOT ONLY did God KNOW everything ABOUT this topic 

GOD CREATED FROM SCRATCH EVERYTHING I WAS STUDYING. 

   Without his creativity none of that information would be present. I guess you could say I just sat there in awe for a moment. First because I was complaining about His handiwork, and secondly because My MiND was pretty much BlOwN.  

   Anyway, this whole exam thing has kinda warped my perspective or maybe it is all the studying getting to my brain. Either way, its been a good day, the night is still young and my to do list is still long... SO, Peace out.